Friday, October 21, 2016

Ouija: Origin of Evil (PG-13/99 Min.)

Had you asked me before this past Tuesday if I’d watch this kind of film, I would have said, “Crap, no!  Those kinds of movies creep me out!!!”  Had you asked me after if I would watch this kind of film again, the answer would be, “Crap, no!  That movie totally creeped me out!”  Then why did I go see it?  First, it’s October.  The one month of the year that I watch lots and lots of scary movies in the safety of my house, a friend’s house, or a movie theater.  Second, I received a free pre-screening pass.  Good reasons, right?  Wrong!

Ouija is about a widowed mother and her two daughters who use the supernatural to scam people out of money.  Unfortunately, they mess with the supernatural one too many times.  The mother brings home a ouija board and immediately ignores all the rules associated with it.  Nice move, mom.  But, don’t get me started about those rules.  Not yet, anyway.  As we quickly saw, there’s a reason that sucker had rules and not following them was so not cool.

I have never, in my life, played with a ouija board.  I’ve never even been around one.  Of course, I was curious when I heard about them but mom nipped that in the bud.  She explained what it was and it scared the stink out of me so badly that I had no further desire to take it beyond curiosity.  Moms are cool like that.  They get paid extra or something.  Needless to say, I very nearly talked myself out of going to see this movie.  But!  I lost that fight.  I usually do.  I just figured I could hide behind my hands like I usually do during scary movies.  Unfortunately, I kept peeking at all the wrong times.  It did help quite a bit that the audience was highly vocal throughout. Even a few of the men hollered during some of the worst scenes.  And the woman behind me kept trying to talk the characters out of doing what they were about to do. 

If you’re looking for a movie, this Halloween season, with a lot of cheap scares and a super creepy story line, then look no further.  This is the movie for you.  If you prefer your scares a little less on the demonic side, you might want to pass this one up.  Speaking of demons, one part of the movie that made it a little less creepy for me was when they showed the demons. I’m not sure what I was expecting but alien-looking critters was not it.  Totally ruined that aspect of it. Granted, consistently showing a young girl with whited-over eyes and a mouth that stretches WAY beyond what is considered normal, pretty much threw it back in the land of “Holy crap!!!”

That little girl may be the biggest reason this movie scared the poo out of a lot of the audience.  It’s one thing to see an adult acting all creepy in these kinds of movies but making a child the center of the scare is another thing altogether.  That girl should get a bonus for being so innocent and so scary all at once.  We felt bad for her because of what was happening and strongly disliked her because of the number of times she jump started our hearts.  It’s been a long, long time since a movie has affected me so badly.  Granted, I grew up on 80s horror and that’s more what I’m drawn to.  It is absolute cheese compared to today’s horror. 

Let me take just a second to discuss the rating of this movie.  PG-13? Really???  I cannot fathom why this movie isn’t rated R.  Yes, I do realize how hypocritical that sounds coming from someone who watched the aforementioned horror movies as a pre-teen and teenager.  Once again, though, while the movies back then were scary, they were all so cookie cutter that you got used to them after a while. Or, they were just so bad they were funny.  Today’s horror films are just different enough from each other that they keep you on your toes. This pre-screening had several young-ish kids at it.  I’m not sure what their parents were thinking but I wonder how bad the nightmares were that night.

I seem to be having some difficulty telling you about the movie without really telling you about the movie.  Let me just say this and then I’ll finish up.  If you, like me, like to fill your Halloween month with scary movies, you might add this to your list. If, however, you like your movies with a little less satanic ritual, you might consider skipping this one.  The one goal of this movie is to scare you and it more than met that goal. 

To the few of you who decide to risk the heart palpitations, I highly recommend staying through the credits.   There was only about 5 or 6 people who stayed after the pre-screening, so a lot of people missed out on the lead-in to a possible sequel.  And ladies, if you go see this with your boyfriend/husband/male friend, you might want to hold his hand.  You don’t want them to get too scared.

Sequel or no, I will not watch this kind of movie again.  Never ever never.  I'll leave those reviews for those who are less faint of heart than I am.

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