Wednesday, July 11, 2018

Skyscraper (PG-13/109min.)




Die Hard on steroids!!!  This was my first thought once the movie really got going.  It is, but then again, it isn’t.  Skyscraper is the story of Will Sawyer, former hostage rescue team leader and current security assessor who is brought to Hong Kong to test the security system for the new tallest building in the world.  And, why not test out part of it by bringing your family along to stay in the building itself?  I mean, what could possibly go wrong?  I know.  You’ve seen the trailers.  You already know the answer to that.
I can already guarantee that this movie won’t win any major awards but I have to say, it was fun.  And, don’t trust the trailers.  They do give a basic overview but they suck compared to the actual film.  I almost called and gave up my seats because what I’d seen up to that point just wasn’t doing it for me.  I’d also had a really bad day and was pretty sure this was not going to bring me out of my crappy mood.  However, Mr. Man wanted to go so we did.  Almost two hours later, what crappy mood?  This is a summer action flick, without a doubt.  You know why you go to see this type of movie.  For the fun.  For the excitement.  For the muscle-knotting tension (though nothing will ever come close to The Grey in that category).  For…The Rock!  When multiple generations of women think you’re hot, you must be doing something right. 
As you can imagine, most of the movie is shot in and around the skyscraper, so there’s no need to really try to describe anything else.  Nothing else in the movie was meant to wow you like this building did.  It truly did WOW, too. 
Let’s talk about a different kind of scenery for a while.
Dwayne Johnson.  Oh my.  Dwayne Johnson.  There are times I feel like he is so completely full of himself that he doesn’t need my adoration and then I go see one of his movies and think, why not?  If I looked like that, I’d stop at a few mirrors, myself.  Enough of that.  Dwayne (I’m gonna assume he’ll let me call him that) is Will Sawyer.  He’s come a long way from the hostage rescue team.  He’s pulled himself up by the bootstrap, started a family, and made a bit of a name for himself in the security field; with a little help from a friend.  He’s tough.  He’s loyal.  He’s not difficult to watch.  He loves his family.  Makes for a pretty good hero.  Will is one daring son of a gun.  Mr. Man just said that he’s like Batman without all the cool gadgets.  No super powers to speak of but he still gets the job done.  He was involved in one of several it-had-to-happen-this-way-to-make-the-rest-of-the-film-work scenes that I still think was ridiculous.  It almost seems as if the writers just couldn’t quite figure out how to get from point A to point B without added silliness.  What I “feared” most happening, though, didn’t.  He was cheese-lite, compare to a lot of his other movies.
Neve Campbell is Will’s wife, Sarah.  I can’t quite decide how I feel about Neve.  She has aged well, dang it.  And she was a good pick for Will’s other half.  I really liked her in Skyscraper.  She’s come a long way from Party of Five and needs to be in many more films.  I’m just saying.  When you really meet Sarah, you immediately figure out the type of woman she is.  If you don’t, you’re not paying attention.  I’m not saying much else about her because what fun would that be?  I liked Sarah.  I liked her a lot. 
Will and Sarah’s kids were played by McKenna Roberts, as Georgia, and Noah Cottrell, as Henry.  One of them plays a pretty big part in Skyscraper.  The other does not.  They were robbed.  I think they did well with what they were given.  I also think they should be cast in bigger roles in the future.  So there.
I know I’ve said that I like this movie and that it was fun but I just can’t let a few things go unsaid.  This almost went in to spoof territory a few times.  Following are some of my biggest complaints.

·       The mom/wife at the very beginning.  You knew!!!  Say something!  But, I guess if the rest of the movie was going to go like it did, you couldn’t.  But still.
·       The security protocols.  Seriously?  I saw that coming from a mile away.  The infant that was crying right before the movie started saw that coming from a mile away.
·       The crowd reaction.  In the movie, I mean.  In a shot viewed from above Dwayne, and looking down, you cannot even make out the crowd.  And yet!!!  Any time it seems as if something bad might happen to our hero, the crowd gasps.  You can’t see him!!!  I’m totally going to ruin this for you and tell you that, FINALLY, you discover that all of this is being played for them on a big screen.  So, yeah.  They could see him.  But, I was already over it at that point
·      The un-reality (non-reality?  utter ridiculousness?) of a few scenes.  I actually leaned over to Mr. Man at one point and said, “I call b.s. on this whole scene.”  I hope my mom doesn’t read this.   
·      The son.  Kid needed more time on screen.  I started to say that he was totally lame but he wasn’t!  They just needed him for something specific and he played his part.  If he hadn’t been what he was, then someone couldn’t have been somewhere when something important needed to happen.  You savvy?
·       And last, but certainly not least, the reason someone didn’t save himself sooner.  My eyes almost rolled out of my head.  It’s called backup, sir.  Look in to it.
Having said all that, I still really REALLY liked it!  Even after seeing everything that went wrong, I want to stay in this building.  It is supercool and needs to really be built.  I don’t think I could be comfortable staying up very high in it but maybe at least halfway. 
If you’re going to see this movie just because it stars Dwayne Johnson, you won’t be disappointed.  If you’re going for the action, again…  If you go with even the smallest thought that this is going to be based on things that could happen in the real world, start practicing your eye rolls now.  But, go anyway!  It was fun.  It was exciting.  It was NOT over the top mushy.  I’m ready to see it again. 

P.S.  No need to stick around once the credits roll unless you want to take a shot at pronouncing the oh-so-many names.  It is insane how many people it takes to make a movie like this.  This had better do good or someone’s not gonna get paid.
P.P.S.  Your children will never look at monkey bars the same way again.  All I can say is, I’d have gone splat.
P.P.P.S.  Skyscraper was brought to you by duct tape.  “If you can’t fix it with duct tape, you’re not using enough duct tape.”  Do NOT try this at home, kids.

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